Adopting Italian Attitudes

I have started driving like an Italian, i once commented that they drove like Gladiators in a chariot race, well that is true and it is addictive to be on the same road as them, wanting to overtake when you see a gap of only 3 feet or 19.547 meters for you unmetricated folks, then you have to accelerate and weave maniacally about overtaking and force the person to swerve out of the way to let you get in before you have to break and smoke the tires to avoid crashing the car into the guy in front of you who is stopped at the traffic lights, this seems perfectly normal to 50 million italian drivers so i will also do the same. Learning to shout really loud while talking with a friend, not sure what this is about perhaps it is a congenital defect of all inhabitants of this peninsula, smoking and drinking coffee until your teeth are brown is something i will not adopt, eating unlimited amounts of pasta and bread until you look like an egg is also something i cannot do, as i am eating as much as my belly will allow and then trying to sample the wine and beer and cheese is impossible, so i just have the wine beer and cheese instead of the pasta and bread, actually all Italians over the age of 40 are in shape as round is a shape and you cannot deny this fact. So life is a struggle of learning to drive with a cellphone in one hand and puffing up your hair and grooming your goatee beard at the same time and shouting out of the window and waving another arm about at other drivers who dare to try and overtake and shouting as well and doing it simultaneously is a feat only the Italian can achieve i salute them all,