My Drive Across Europe, Madness

I have just returned from an extended trip to the UK France and Spain. It was a trip for two reasons, one I had to go and see my family as my dad is 86 and is very old and losing his marbles and to see my sister and brothers. I was also going to Spain to try and finalise the sale of a small Spanish house I bought several years ago for holidays but I never use anymore as it is far too far to travel anymore. I was planning on using my old car that is in the garage and needed some work but after checking out the insurance situation and the costs of getting the car on the road it seemed very expensive. I checked for a rental and again using a rental in Europe was outrageously expensive, like $1200 for two weeks. I was getting worried as I had arranged meetings for Spain and I still had no transport. I had also promised my wife a drive in France so she could practice her French and this was looking like a long shot now, I could see trouble ahead.
I went and visited my old buddy at his factory and just asked by chance if he had a car I could borrow for the trip as he son was away in the USA at college and he had a car, it was a mini and it would have been a small squeeze but at least it was cheaper than the rental. So studied for a few minutes and said “Yes I think you can borrow my Mercedes and I can use the mini”. I was shocked and delighted at the same time, he was allowing me to use his pride and joy the 20 year old 300SEC Merc. I had driven with him in it many times and never thought he would let me use this one. He organised the insurance and that was £150 extra which I said I would pay. It was huge and auto, perfect for driving on the wrong side of the road on a long journey. I picked it up the next day and it felt grand to drive in this impressive car. I packed all my stuff and the wife and little girl and set off for France. I had to fill the gas tank to start with and I then realised it may have been a bit of a mistake to use this huge car as it took £72 in gas and only does around 20 miles to the gallon and I had nearly 4000 miles to do that is going to cost me about £800 or $1400, jeez this trip is going to cost me a fortune. We got to Dover for the afternoon ferry and bought my ticket at £135, and we landed about 9pm in France. For anyone who has never driven in France then all the roads head for Paris and it is so goddam confusing to get on a road you know is heading south but it says Paris as the last destination, this is because all the main highways head for Paris and there are virtually no roads that go around Paris. So after only a few miles we were lost and driving through little towns in the middle of the night totally lost. Getting on highways that headed for Paris which I didn’t want and then getting lost after trying to get off them so for about 4 hours we wandered about northern France going in circles and we had to pull over to get a nap in a lay-by. It was a freezing night in France, the temperature indicator was reading 1.5 C outside and after 2 hours taking a nap we were all freezing and shivering inside the car. We had to start driving again to avoid dying of hyperthermia. We set off and managed to get to le Mans which is part of the way down France. We got lost again immediately we left le Mans and again were travelling down minor roads and into a huge town and were driving through the centre at 5 am, it was crazy, all frustrated and lost knowing every extra mile was costing a shitload of money in the gas burning monster of a car I was driving. We finally got onto a major road that was taking us south towards Spain and pulled over in a service centre and got some food and a coffee and had two hours sleep. It was 9 am when we woke and found the temperature was a roaring 7 C. The weather was crap all cloudy and misty and cold and dreary, far worse than England. The wind was blowing really hard and was very keen. We set of with many more miles to travel and as we passed by the fields in this farming area my wife was looking miserable and finally said it was nothing like she had expected in France. She had mentioned several times that she would love to spend a year in France to improve and perfect her French. I was complaining saying it was expensive and had crap weather. But as we went through the barren fields and not many houses it was obvious that her dreams were being shattered, she had seen films of the Mediterranean and thought it was all sunshine, warmth and hills and trees and lovely nice houses, not flat horrible ploughed fields and no trees and no houses. So that will save me some money anyway. We went through some pine plantations as we headed south that lasted for perhaps a hundred miles, nothing but boring pine plantations. We spent maybe 6 or 7 hours driving and needed a hotel and I was planning a night in Biarritz. we were getting hammered by road tolls all the time and they were not cheap, in total maybe 60 euros across france. We got there about 3pm and tried driving into town and were driving round and round a terrible one way system that left us nowhere to find a small hotel anywhere. We went out of town and down the coast a little bit and found some little village with a nice hotel away from the main road. It was nice but damn it was £50 for the night, it had no heating and a tiny bedroom and crap cable TV, they are just an expensive country, gas was almost as expensive as the UK. We went for a meal in the nearby beach restaurant and the food was very expensive and small portions all typical of France. The bill was 50 Euros for two meals and 3 drinks. We did have a great nights sleep and felt very refreshed after a hot steaming bath in the morning and a breakfast of cereal and fruits. We set of again and the border is only 10 miles south and we set off and filled up with fuel in Spain that was nearly half the price of the UK and France, a great start I thought. The roads were much better laid out and the tolls were very few and far between and only perhaps 2 tolls at the start of the trip until we got onto the Madrid main road. The road was direct and fast and not that busy we stopped for something to eat and the food was in a different class to France, it was cooked nicely and lots of choices and prices were about as expensive but it was a proper meal not service station crap like France. We got to Madrid pretty quickly and then another 600 km to go, I was checking my watch and seeing if we could get to the coast by night to save driving the next day, I sped up a little and driving through the southern mountains was spectacular and very beautiful, the temperature had risen to 14 C, not great but much better than France. The drive was wonderful not getting lost once and very scenic, Jenny was very impressed, we got inot my little town about 9.30pm and I went directly to the guest house I stayed in last time and knocked on the door, out popped the old guys head and asked what we wanted, I said “I hope you have a room for me”, it took him a while to recognise me and he then invited us in, he asked if we wanted a drink of tea. Real english tea in Spain, woohoo I was delighted at that offer. He brought in the tea and we chatted for about 30 minutes and then he brought out the wine and I had a lovely big glass of this nice red stuff, it was cheap but Spanish red is far better than French cheap red. I drank that and we left to find somewhere to have a late dinner. I remembered a small place across the small town and hoped that it was open , we got through the doors at 11 pm and yes it was open, we were the only people there though and I ordered a beer for me and the wife and he then presented us with a small tapas, a tiny dish of food which was beef in sauce and a few fries. It was delicious and every time I ordered a beer we got another tapas, the next one was fried squid and was also delicious and we didn’t need a meal I got drunk eating with my tapas, it was great stuff, we ate for about an hour and went back to the Bed and breakfast place about midnight, for a fantastic sleep and to get ready for my day sorting out the old house.

My Little House in the southern spanish mountains